The Brewing Process Update: Making Wort

In retrospect I'm not sure what I was so intimidated by. The brewing process (so far) has been remarkably straightforward. I was most likely getting hung up on why the process works (as I'm prone to do) rather than accepting the fact that it was working. It also makes more sense seeing and doing it, rather than just reading about the parts as a sum of a whole.

We began by sanitizing the equipment with a powder that is something like a diluted bleach, and submerging the can of extract in warm water in the sink. Next we brought a pot of 1 1/2 gallons of water to a boil, removed the extract, opened the can, and poured it in slowly while stirring. It became apparent to me why we initially submerged the extract in water; it's very viscous. Remove the pot from heat and stir the extract until uniform color. Next add dextro-maltan, the hops, and more extract. Stir until uniform which takes a little time because the dextro-maltan and extract are powders. Bring back to heat and "boil off." While on the heat this time, it's normal for it to bubble up near to the top of the pot. When it does this take it off the heat and let it go down, then bring it back until it no longer bubbles up, then take it off the heat and allow it to cool.

The solution in the pot is called wort. It is unfermented beer in a concentrated form. I got the sense that it was beer, something just needed to happen to it. While the wort was cooling we added 3 1/2 more gallons of warm water to the fermentation bucket which coupled with the wort would make 5 gallons, the normal size of a home brew beer batch. It equals out to somewhere between 48 and 50 12oz beers. After the wort had cooled we poured it vigorously into the fermentation bucket and stirred it. Next came the yeast which as I understood it, did all the leg work in actually making the beer. Stir the yeast and give it 7-10 minutes and cover it with the sanitized lid of the fermentation bucket. It was this time that we took a specific gravity.

A specific gravity is a measure that provides a density for your solution against water which has a specific gravity of one. The higher your specific gravity, the denser a liquid is. The instruction provides a beginning and ending specific gravity that you should be aiming for. We took a specific gravity and found it to be precisely where the instructions said it was supposed to be. This made me very excited for some reason and I launched into a discourse in what a urine specific gravity is, normal and abnormal, and what it could mean for a person. To his credit, Dan did his best to humor me, and appear interested. I honestly couldn't care if he was interested, I was going to ramble, it's what I do. It's what I'm doing.

With the lid on it's time to stay out of the way, store it in a cool location, and let the yeast metabolize and ferment the wort, bringing it ever closer to the Brown Ale that we will bottle and let sit for two weeks longer before it's ready for consumption and distribution to my friends and family.

Update on Brewing

Monday March 29th, the man-date Dan and I had planned two weeks prior. I tell him that we're still on in spite of the fact that I worked an overnight and didn't get in until 8:30AM. I tell him that we're still on and to wear something low cut, but you know? Classy.

Well aware of the fact that Maine Brewing Supply on Forest Ave is closed, I google the hop shop in Gray. Also closed on Monday's. Daniel-san however, being the well traveled fellow he is, is aware of several more potential suppliers. Gotta hand it to him, the kid is always there when you need him. Except when you run 29 Toss and he goes lead blocking to the right, and you get your ass kicked (I'm not bitter).

The only thing keeping me awake is my barely contained enthusiasm, closely tied to the fact that I have no idea what I'm doing.

"Dan, none of this shit is combustible right?"

"Yes and no."

"Not yes or no?"

"Don't be a pussy."

Al Contemplates the Pros and Cons of Brewing Beer

We've all thought about it. That is a huge generalization that I sincerely want to believe (self high five for spelling sincerely right without spell check). I enjoy tossing myself into new projects and becoming engrossed in them. Exploring passions, hobbies, and creating things is fascinating. It appeals to the human spirit to be creating things. Here I go, getting much too philosophical about beer. Time to get scientific.

One of the things that caught my attention about brewing beer is how challenging it is. How much of a process it is. I enter this process with the full understanding that I will more than likely fail my first batch of home brewed beer. The only consolation I have is that despite how bad my home brewed beer is, I have more than likely drank worse beer. I must never let it escape my head that it is my beer too, for better or worse. Nevertheless, although the eventuality of failure is present in my mind there is also the prospect of fortune lingering like a golden feather caught in a light wind, that I must chase, and grab.

...Shut up.

No fo real, I might actually be able to create a good batch of beer that people will enjoy. By people, I more than likely mean people close to me, friends and family. That would be awesome. I have no thoughts about turning this into a business. Although let's be honest, the market exists. Regardless of economics, people will drink, especially in New England. I would target those folks with a desire to experiment and try new beers. Those with an interested palate, those unwilling to survive on Bud Light.

However I know myself well enough to know that the longer I talk about it, the less likely it is to get done. When too much planning go into something, you wind up only planning, and not doing. Then again you don't want to walk into something completely blind, so it's a happy medium of knowing enough to screw around, but not wasting too much time on the logistics when you should be doing legwork. Even blogging about my desire to brew beer is probably a step in the wrong direction, at the risk of sounding hypocritical.

Here is a brief synopsis of the brewing process a la John Palmer:

1. Malted barley is soaked in hot water to release the malt sugars.
2. The malt sugar solution is boiled with Hops for seasoning.
3. The solution is cooled and yeast is added to begin fermentation.
4. The yeast ferments the sugars, releasing CO2 and ethyl alcohol.
5. When the main fermentation is complete, the beer is bottled with a little bit of added sugar to provide the carbonation.

See how complex that is? I have to reach all the way back to my high school chemistry class to decipher most of that. As I recall, I spent the majority of that class sleeping, while my Asian lab partner did our work. Was it a coincidence that he was both Asian and my lab partner? For you to decide. What was I going to use Chemistry for anyway? If she had said early on in that class, "Hey you may someday need this to brew beer," well I probably still would've slept through most of it.

I would like to believe all it would take for me to brew beer is a "How to brew beer for dummies" book (They better make that!) and capital (i.e. money). It would be nice however to have an inside man. A partner in crime, so to speak.

Enter my friend Dan, uniquely suited for our purposes. While far from a brew master, Dan has concocted several recipes for home brews, some of which I've tried and thoroughly enjoyed. Dan shares my passion for good beer, good food, and quoting movies in everyday conversation. His background in the food industry runs deep, and as such has garnered a healthy know-how that I fear I may lack.

Besides anything that's worth doing, is worth doing with your good buddy, drunk, naked, or all three. Two heads are better than one. And now when we're drinking beer, it's research.

I'll keep you posted on progress.

Foot note: Dan is working on a cookbook targeted at college students exiting college. Quick, good meals with steps that even college kids can follow. He calls it "The Google of cookbooks." When it's published, I'll review the shit out of it.

Let's Play a Game...

It's called listen to me. I have a blog. You don't. Maybe you do. But you're reading mine. Aren't you?

Confused yet?

I haven't even started.

Do you have a favorite pair of underwear? It's a good day when you put them on. Maybe you need them that day. I was thinking it would be great to have several pairs of that same favorite underwear, but then I immediately renounced my position on that stance. The favorite underwear, or favorite everything for that matter, loses its status by there being more than one of them. In its solidarity, it's rarity, is its inherent value. Supply and demand. Should my supply of favorite underwear increase, the day(s) that I wear them are by virtue no longer special. Production would fall and the economy would go into a bigger tailspin than it's already in without me to by excessive amounts of DVDs.

So be grateful that there's only one pair of special underwear.

I debuted my golf season yesterday. The thing is, what grabbed me back to golf, is the occasionally amazing shot I make amidst the more frequent mediocre shots, and the often bad. The bad are always absolved by the amazing shots. When I make one, a clean strike, headed for the flag, or a straight drive 275 yards down the heart of the fairway, I often think "Wouldn't that be great if I could do that every time?" I think that usually after I get over myself, and several enthusiastic fist pumps.

Fucking Tiger.

His fall from grace was steeper than any non-political figure in history. I feel that what made him so great, also inspired his off-the course, his extracurricular activities, if you will. On the course he's capable of anything, perhaps he was fooled into thinking that applied elsewhere. The news shook the world. You had to know something was up with Tiger. So enigmatic he was, so unreachable, except on his terms. You only saw what he wanted you to see, what he allowed you to see. This is the first we've seen a human Tiger Woods. Yet in his interviews, press conferences are very limited by time, limited in questions. Still controlling the terms, or attempting to.

All of this hoopla, the shenanigans, really doesn't change much for me. I will absolutely still tune in to watch him golf. He's brilliant. I defy you not to watch him do, what it is he does, better than anyone else in the world.

Things you should have that you may need at a certain point that may or may not be right now. Subtext: Fog machine

Woah nelly! Long hiatus from blogging exploits is a direct result of lack of material. After a short (but important) conversation with my sister I arrived at a startling conclusion: I need a fog machine (or several). A fog machine falls under a long and distinguished list of things that I may need to use some day, but will more than likely take up space and add clutter.

It's a risk I'm willing to take.

A fog machine, as the name implies, spews fog. To what end and purpose I will utilize the fog machine is unknown to me at this point. What is certain is that I will use it. With a fog machine one can make dramatic entrances from room to room making day to day life more epic. When I think about it, it's much harder to think of ways not to use a fog machine. I can only thing of one. On a foggy day, why in the hell would you need a fog machine? You friggin yahoo. Imbecile.

The fog machine could be used in conjunction with strobe lights, pyrotechnics, huge sub-woofers, maybe some skeletons (from real people naturally), and Alice Cooper. But really, the fog machine is key. With all the other amenities and no fog machine is like having 12 Robins and no Batman. Colorful, young boys.

Think about it.

Fog machines fit into every single holiday, either by history itself or from a festive.

1. Christmas: Santa could use a little fog down the chimney instead of smoke. And you could use a fog machine at Christmas parties to reduce the viability to zero, thus blotting out those god-awful Christmas sweaters.
2. Easter: When Jesus returned, you bet your ass there was fog. No one could make an entrance like that dude.
3. Valentines day: Set the mood with a little light fog.
4. Arbor day: Self-explanatory.

I should be a god damned salesman. So far fog machines and nutella have received free advertisement on my blog. You're welcome you ungrateful pricks.